STAGE CENTRE PRODUCTIONS
proudly present the fifth and final play of their milestone 40th season
Anything to Declare?
A chaotic and wacky farce by Maurice Hennequin and Pierre Veber
Translated and adapted by Greg Leaming
“Side-splittingly funny… The utterly ridiculous is also utterly hilarious. From start to finish Anything to Declare? had me giggling.” ~ The Mancunian, 2014
*8are c y, a boulevard comedy that is This is a funny,
Directed by Tony Rein
Producer: Michael James Burgess
Stage Manager: Lorraine Kimsa
Set Design: J. B. Pierre Rajotte
Lighting by Clay Warner
With Tommy Boston, Katherine Cappellacci, Michael Chodos, Kate Coursey, Robert Glen, Jennie Garde,
Jen Hashimoto, Catherine Linehan, Kalen Malan, James Marshall, Pierre Rivard, Lindsay Woodford and Michael Yaneff
“Panic is the chief ingredient…. as the emergencies mount for a bashful bridegroom, his hypocritical father-in-law, a frustrated former suitor and a de-pantsed camel dealer.” ~ San Francisco Chronicle
The Dupont family is thrilled that their naïve young daughter has married Count Robert de Trivelin. However, upon returning from their honeymoon, it is made clear that the young bridegroom has yet to consummate the marriage, and indeed seems to be suffering from a psychological block brought on by a border crossing guard yelling out “Have you anything to declare?” at a particularly inopportune moment. The hapless count’s in-laws give him a three-day deadline by which to do his duty. If he fails, his bride will be handed over to a rival suitor!
With such a short time left to meet his mother-in-law’s demands for a grandson, or at least the promise of one, the count seeks the assistance of Zeze, a courtesan who is passing herself off to her clientele as a prominent artist and nicknames her clients after famous painters. The entire Dupont family manages to parade through Zeze’s salon and back to the Dupont home, along with a sobbing ex-suitor of the bride, a camel dealer of unknown origin, and a maid desperate to break ties with Zeze and start a career of her own. As the clock continues to tick away, a chaotic race to consummate the marriage results in everyone learning just a little bit more than they might have wanted to!
Yes, the play is all about sex — but sex in a world of old-fashioned innocence where young women remain chaste until their wedding night and husbands would do anything — including a visit to a ‘working girl’ — to prove how much they love their wives. But it’s a French farce, of course, which means that innocence is wrapped in a wacky story of misplaced pants, mistaken identities, and a whirlwind of zany characters running in and out of lots of doors.
Anything to Declare?, with its bawdy innuendo, utterly absurd situations, and sparkling characterizations, will have Stage Centre audiences laughing until the final curtain!
“Improbable situations, mistaken identity, stylized performances and verbal dexterity on themes of various levels of sophistication.” ~ Stage Magazine, 2012
May 18 – 20 & May 24 – 27, 2017: 8:00 p.m.
May 21 & 27, 2017: 2:00 pm Matinee
“Great fun!” ~ Michael Billington, The Guardian, 2007